As I'm sure some of you know from experience, organising an event like a conference can be quite a stressfull experience, especially when you're doing it for your friends / colleagues. As it turned out, this year's VSO conference was organised by a friend of mine (Gill) so a few of us pitched in to help things run as smoothly as possible. By the last night we were all pretty much glad it was over and needed a break. We had even anticipated that this would be the case so had organised a few days holiday nearby on a tea estate. I know, I know, life can be tough sometimes but you just have to struggle on regardless don't you?

The place we'd chosen to go to was the UK Department for International Development (DFID) Tea Estate in Srimongal, a small town in Bangladesh tea country. We'd heard great things about the place (British food, nice bungalows, pool, no annoying Bangladeshis etc.) so were all really looking forward to it. Our anticipation was heightened by the difficulty we had in booking rooms, and the fact we couldn't get in as early as we wanted due to the place being booked out by an American school. When we double-checked with the manager a few days before arriving he muttered something about having American students running around "everywhere". He had our sympathies.

Seeing as we couldn't go straight after the conference to this haven of relaxation we had to find something to do for 2 days. I should perhaps mention who "we" were i.e. 5 other volunteers that have been more or less mentioned in previous entries. They were Ann and Bjort (the couple living north of me who I've visited twice and went to Darjeeling with), Sarah (also of Darjeeling fame), Gill (recently changed to a placement not far from mine and conference co-organiser in need of a rest) and Graham (based down in south-west and making his first appearance in this diary). Getting back to the story, we had 2 days to kill and not a lot of options to fill them with. The first day we spent in Sylhet as quite frankly we were all too tired and hung-over from the last night party to do anything else. We did manage a walk around a tea estate though and saw some monkeys. Well, I say "we" as personally I only saw 1 monkey quite a way off climbing up a tree but the others claim they say loads of the buggers next to the track we were ambling down.

In the evening we headed out to the one restaurant in town that everyone said was great and served European food. It was a complete and utter disaster. They took over 40 minutes to bring us any food, and when they did they brought the starters (2 prawn cocktails that should take minutes to prepare at the most assuming they weren't ready to go in a fridge) with the main courses. When I say they brought the main courses that sort of implies they managed to bring all of them doesn't it? This establishment, supposedly run by 2 expats, managed to only bring half of my order (meatballs without the pasta) and none of Sarah's. What they did bring was mediocre at best, though in fairness they did a good job of Bjort's dish. He had been wise enough to order an Indian dish rather than straining the culinary talents and logistical capabilities of a kitchen that only had 2 other customers who were eating soup. They did knock a bit off the bill at the end, but in an attempt to remain totally consistent throughout the experience, they also got the bill wrong and tried to overcharge us. At one point we thought Sarah was going to pulp the waiter but thankfully we left without resorting to physical violence.

The next day we decided to go to Srimongal so that we could reach the DFID estate as early as humanly possible the next morning. We hired a microbus that only turned up 30 minutes late (trust me, you get used to it after a while) and drove on some of the worst roads we'd seen for 3 hours. The highlight was my first ferry journey under the shadow of the bridge being built to span what is by local standards a modest river. We are currently coming towards to end of the dry season so river levels are quite low. The result is that the ramps leading to the ferry from the bank were not quite low enough, leaving a step of 30-40 cm for vehicles to drop down to board and get off the other side. As our microbus negotiated the step the inevitable happened and the rear left wheel was punctured.

Now, for all it's problems and annoyances Bangladesh does have some positive aspects, and these are especially evident when it comes to solving these sorts of problems. For example, the roads here are so bad that people know that things can go wrong and often do. As a result, we didn't have 1 microbus driver but 2, as if they needed to find help one of them could stay with the vehicle. Secondly, they had a spare wheel ready to go and had it on before the ferry had even reached the other side of the river. It happened so fast it was a bit like watching the Ferrari mechanics during a Grand Prix. And even if they hadn't managed to fix the problem we could have found a mechanic and/or tools on either side of the river as there always are. No matter where you go you can find someone who will fix your motorbike or build you a table for ridiculous prices, and that sort of service is something I could get very used to believe me!

Eventually we made it to Srimongal and found our hotel, "The Plaza". If ever a hotel was ambitiously named it was this one. Granted it was only 2 pounds a night for a double room without air-conditioning but it was really, really bad. I made the mistake of moving one of the beds and found a huge dead spider. When we arrived we were told that the rooms were ready but we needed to wait 10 minutes. "So, the rooms aren't ready then?" we asked. "Oh yes they're ready, but you must wait 10 minutes" came the reply. "If the rooms are ready why must we wait 10 minutes?" was the question you'd usually ask but after a few months here you realise that logic really doesn't work. As it turned out the rooms weren't ready as we had to ask for sheets for the beds, as well as toilet paper and soap for the bathrooms that they actually went out and bought for us on the spot. It truly is a different world my friends.

There's nothing really to do in Srimongal so we had lunch, used one of the many many Internet cafe's this small town has (but why so many?) and rested before going out for dinner. We consulted our bible in these matters i.e. the Lonely Planet, and learnt that the eateries it recommended had ceased to exist 2 years ago. The latest edition came out in 2000, which just goes to show how many people come to Bangladesh. Anyway, our helpful hotel man told us about a chinese restaurant around the corner and said it was good. We didn't have any other options so off we went and found "Doctor's House". It turns out it's an illegal restaurant without any licence of any description and no menu, and it was great. The food was fantastic, the lack of menu meant we ordered whatever we fancied, we could take booze in and we even had our own room to eat in. The service was prompt and discrete, the manager a nice guy, and all in all it was just the complete opposite of the fiasco of the previous night in Sylhet.

The next morning we arranged to meet at 8.30 to have breakfast and get to our bungalows and pool as soon as humanly possible. We all had the worst night's sleep of our lives. The mattresses we dreadful, we didn't have mosquito nets in our room, and the local mosque was just the other side of the street with an excessively effective sound system calling the faithful to prayer at ungodly hours of the morning. Next came the challenge of finding breakfast, so we split up into a "fruit" team and a "bread" group to scour the town. We found what we were looking for, but some of us (not I) really struggled without our early morning hit of caffeine. When we'd eventually eaten and checked-out we were more than ready to endure the 20 minute rickshaw ride to the DFID estate. The key problem here was that we didn't know where it was, and Lonely Planet maps are notorious crap, but we made it in the end and didn't get into too much trouble settling a price for the journey. Even when we'd got to the estate it still seemed like the forces of darkness were still conspiring against us we couldn't find the manager or anyone else who knew where our bungalows were. Someone eventually sorted it out, I dumped my stuff, pulled on a pair of shorts and hit the pool.

That's pretty much all I did for the next 3 days really, and I didn't take a single photo (apart from the contents of my rucksack). We ate British food, lounged by the pool, played a little tennis and badminton, drank beer and talked about life in Bangladesh. That last part wasn't always very funny but you need your support group out here and it's important to let people know how you're really feeling. Funnily enough, we still tend to assume that if someone seems to be OK and doesn't tell you the contrary then they are OK. They aren't of course as we all have things we find difficult. It's like we still think like we do back home when it comes to how others "appear" to be bearing up, but at the same time we find it difficult to understand why others don't always see we do need support for certain things.

The emphasis here is on the individual to share and ask for support as no one likes prying too much. But therein lies the difficulty as us management volunteers are all, generally speaking, people who are used to being strong and independent. In our previous lives we were probably the ones who supported others rather than the one needing support. Indeed, life back in the UK etc. wasn't as hard as here so it was easier to be that person. Some of us find it difficult to open up as we fear it will make us more vulnerable and will undermine the image of strength we have built up and so want to keep. However, and ironically, the very strength we seek and need in Bangladesh comes from the support we receive from others. Opening up does not make us more vulnerable to them or others but stronger and better able to cope with whatever difficulties we have. One volunteer told me that the most important thing she learnt from her placement was that there were things she could not do. I think she was talking about things she couldn't do alone, and others have told me stories about the dangers of asking for help too late. I too am learning that lesson and I believe it's a valuable one.